Painful! actress Vuyelwa Mpela (Alyce) opens up on her struggle to fall pregnant

Painful! actress Vuyelwa Mpela (Alyce) opens up on her struggle to fall pregnant

 

She’s always wanted children but like many ladies she had to weigh the pressures of building her career against the choice to start out a family – and she’s unsure she made the proper choice. Actress Vuyelwa Mpela is now on the eve of turning 40 and is forced to face the likelihood she might never realize her dream of conceiving a toddler. Six years ago she was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome, a condition which will seriously compromise fertility. “In part, I blame myself because I waited too long and didn’t address my health issues sooner,” she says. As a young, single performer she knew success would require diligence and sacrifice, so she pulled out all the stops to form a go of her career and delayed the prospect of youngsters. After all, there’d be many time for that, she reasoned. She entered our living rooms early within the 2000s as beloved Alyce Morapedi on 7de Laan and quickly became hooked in to work. Every now and again her inner voice piped up that dream she’d delayed of getting a family, but she silenced it, reminding herself that she was young and still had tons to accomplish. Now she can’t help but wonder if pregnancy would’ve come more easily if she hadn’t put things off, or if she’d gone to ascertain a doctor sooner about her health issues. “Is this the value of getting a career?” she asks. “Something that I now realise is more precious than any of the achievements of the past 20 years?” Vuyelwa now stars within the SABC2 drama Swartwater and therefore the plot has only intensified her looking for motherhood. Her character, Portia, may be a new mom who struggles with severe postpartum depression. Vuyelwa found it emotionally challenging to urge into Portia’s head – the sleepless nights, the crying baby, the sensation of desperation – while in real world she was longing to urge pregnant. She tries to not obsess about it, Vuyelwa adds. “I never wanted [getting pregnant] to be ‘work’ or ‘a project’. I feel that puts an excessive amount of pressure on something that’s alleged to be natural, beautiful and organic. I do have my obsessive moments then quickly shove these thoughts aside.” But that approach doesn’t always work, she admits. She’s started experiencing a near-physical ache whenever she’s around babies or young children then it’s only a matter of your time before the darkness closes in. VUYELWA has always guarded her personal life closely and for the foremost part has kept her husband, businessman Mathata Mpela (50), and marriage out of the limelight. The couple met in ny where Mathata, who was born in Lesotho, grew up. He now runs an organisation called Nalane, which specialises in building a green economy. Vuyelwa spent tons of your time within the long island early in her career and studied at the ny Film Academy in 2005 before returning to South Africa. Her health problems started in 2014 during another extended stay within the long island. Over the course of eight months, she had near-continual menstrual bleeding. “I was constantly in pain,” she recalls. “Plus I’ve always been anaemic, so it wasn’t good in the least.” When the pain became an excessive amount of in touch, the friend she was staying with called an ambulance and Vuyelwa was admitted to Sinai Beth Israel Hospital in Manhattan. After a series of tests, she was diagthem. nosed with polycystic ovary syndrome and was warned the condition could affect her fertility. “I was confused, shocked and scared. But I needed to affect things at hand and see thereto that I got better.” She later met Mathata at an occasion and that they became friends. “I helped him together with his organisation and things developed from there,” Vuyelwa says. The couple, who were married in February last year, now sleep in Johannesburg, where Vuyelwa also works as an executive producer at e.tv. She’s says Mathata has known about her health issues from the beginning and has been nothing but supportive. “Like me, he loves kids and works with underprivileged children and orphans,” she says. The couple are getting to keep trying for a baby before deciding whether to explore other options. “I’m still hopeful that I’ll be a mother.” ONLY women who are desperate for a toddler will know the pain of seeing a negative result on a bioassay over and once again, Vuyelwa says. She eventually decided to prevent taking “I just couldn’t handle the anxiety after taking one and therefore the disappointment when it’s not the result I’d hoped for.” Her psychological state is another issue she’s constantly performing on. She’s been vocal about her struggle with depression and knows it’s an ongoing battle. “I’ve had to simply accept it’s something I’ll need to remember of and manage for the remainder of my life,” she says. There are other setbacks. Her mom, Thandiwe, died in February 2017, each day after her 72nd birthday. “We were close,” Vuyelwa says. “It was an excellent loss on behalf of me.” Her father, Johannes (76), has Alzheimer’s and it’s hard for her to observe him deteriorate, she says. He was diagnosed in 2012 and therefore the death of his wife dealt him an important blow. “He’s a shadow of the person he wont to be. It’s incredibly painful to ascertain. I’m grateful I can still see him and listen to his voice – unlike with my mom. Her passing contributed to me taking my psychological state seriously.” Vuyelwa features a good relationship together with her husband’s two teenage children from his first marriage but they sleep in America and Vuyelwa says there’s a void in her heart. “It’s always been a part of my life’s purpose to be a wife to my husband and to be a mom,” she says. “But i think there’ll be children in our life, a method or another.” ‘Is this the value of getting a career? Something I now realise is more precious than any achievement?’

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